Stepping Into Bravery

:: A journal I felt like sharing with you, thanks 🙂 ::

I learned something after watching Harry Potter. There are some moments where things are so scary and so bad. It might seem there is no hope and that all the odds are against you; however, you have a choice. You can either run and hide and cower, or you can take a few breaths, and realize this is what you have to do, you have to fight, you have to face the situation head on, even if it means you might die.  Continue reading “Stepping Into Bravery”

Happy Holidays: Cheesy Movies and Revelations



:: Authors note…this entry was just for me, but then I thought, hey its been a while since I last blogged, so enjoy the read! ::

I just watched an awesome perfect cheesy christmas movie… it was boss. So great I really enjoyed it. Perfect movie for the moment.

Anyways in the movie the main character kept repeating the same day ( christmas eve ) for 12 days. Each day she was able to re-live the same day. She ended up ‘stopping and smelling the roses’ so to speak and as she interacted and lived more presently more and Continue reading “Happy Holidays: Cheesy Movies and Revelations”

Learning to Live, and then Applying it!

Hello Cyber world 🙂

Good day to you ! Its been a while since i’ve been able to post something on this beautiful blog platform. Today is 77 and sunny, and the flowers are beginning to bloom,and the children are screaming and playing outside. Its nice vibes.

Today on Facebook someone posted a blog about a man who was 24 years old and discovered he would be transitioning on from this planet. The link is bellow if you are interested in reading it- its short and sweet….

Powerful Advice From a Dying Man

He basically explains how, sometimes, it is only when we realize we are leaving this earth, that we realize whats important, and where we should spend our energy. He wrote this  post because he felt he wasn’t able to leave behind anything that he thought could really benefit the plant and its inhabitance, even though I’m sure he has, but regardless he wanted to send good vibes out before he had to leave.

Its things like this that remind me how important it is to be courageous and to get our priorities strait sooner than later, because there really is so much we can give to each other, share with each other, and do to inspire and encourage each other while we are here. But we have to take the action steps and we do have a limited amount of time to take them.

Continue reading “Learning to Live, and then Applying it!”


For the last few weeks i’ve been craving to write a post. There were so many times when i experienced something, and i thought to myself “oh i have to write about that on Inside OUT” but i never did.

This was irking me but i realized there was more behind it. I was scared, or rather I am scared… of lots of things…. but beyond just admitting that, I realized how FEAR is a four letter word, that really does stop us from doing anything…. “I’m not ready I’m not good enough, they wont like it, its been done before, I’m stupid i shouldn’t try, i shouldn’t have wrote that, what do they think about me, am i an idiot for thinking i could have gotten what i wanted it? ” These are the type of thoughts that stem from fear…. and fear is legitimate and important… it tells us more about ourselves…..but it will only block us if we choose to never overcome it…

Continue reading “cHoICe”

The Purest Form


Today i want to talk about you, and to talk about me.

I want to tell you something that i feel.

We don’t realize how much we effect and touch each other.

We don’t realize a simple comment on facebook, a text message, a phone call, a smile, a hug, a thought, an action towards someone affects them, and in turn affects us.

For example today i just simply opened my Facebook page and saw a few messages from family and friends, and i felt their love, their support, they honesty, their struggle, their gifts, their potential…i felt it all…but most of all i felt their love for me…. and it felt so strong so powerful and so heavily blessed, that my whole lower chakra area from my stomach down bubbled up with tingles and with light and with warmth… with pure gratitude and feeling of so much love and so much blessings.

We have no idea how much we affect each other… we have no idea…every single person we meet, and sound we hear, every breath we take, ever experience we have had… we are so deeply affected.

This is why it has been more so my primary goal over almost anything else to cultivate a type of love and trust and nurturing in myself, so i can easily without feeling of lack or jealousy or anger, be that person to someone else … to everyone else i encounter. The more compassion i develop for myself when i feel negative emotions such as frustration or anxiety or fear or hurt, the more i understand why I’m feeling those things and allow myself to feel those things and think those thoughts without judging myself for doing so, the more i can understand when others are going through those experiences…the more i can forgive them..and the more i can take their reactions and words and actions less to heart/less personally…more loving and inclusive rather than fearful and exclusive.

I am very far away from my friends from my family…who have thus far played such a role in my life. i really miss their warmth, their familiarity, their care, their comfort that they give me…but i still very much feel their presence, feel their love and support, and feel our connection. Whenever i get a message or see a picture they send me or share some new information with them, i feel so much more strong than i did the moment before, because i feel connected with them.

We as people have the ability to really connect with each other. As we slowly relinquish the ideas of disconnection, we begin to see clearly how much we are each other, and we begin to realize how much we really truly touch each other. This can go both ways, so the impure intentions and thoughts we have about each other can also be felt no matter how far away we might be on a physical level. However, the more we understand why these feelings are coming up the more we can pass through it and heal that core root of why it occurred in the first place. For me I believe more and more that these healings begin first in our own minds and hearts and ripple out like a pebble dropped in a silent river… and touch and heal every other.

I am very grateful to have gone inside to a point to be able to feel confident enough to reach in and expel all these feelings and emotions and thoughts. I am very touched to have you family and you friends and you all other support beyond realms and words to help me dive deep into this journey and be brave enough to take small or big action steps now and in the future.

I want to say thank you to all types of communities i have in all different places including the outlet of wordpress, as well as Facebook and Viber and Whatsapp and Skype and all the other applications that enable me to keep in touch with the people i love and care about.

I find that You are my inspiration, and that there are many messages constantly everywhere that urge us to walk a certain direction. in every moment or the journey. I am very grateful for these messages, and very grateful to share these perspectives with you.

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What If !!!! ? Magic!


so a new goal…

So many times we always just hope for the bare minimum. like ‘as long as it actually follows through, or as long as we get through it, or if i could just reach this point, i’ll be happy”

Theres a famous saying thats ‘reach for the stars…set your expectations high and your outcomes will always be more than you expect them to be’

Today I realized that Im one of those people who basically just hope that the worst doesn’t happen, and if it doesn’t happen then I succeeded.

Perhaps it feels better to set your expectations low so you won’t be disappointed. But what if thats the very reason we dont get the gold in the bucket, or the rainbow outcome…because we really just dont expect it. Our mind is set on just reaching ends meet, bare minimum, a little more than failure….

Ive never really pondered upon this but its an interesting idea….

Perhaps we should set out for rainbows and butterflies, joy and happiness, dreams and magic…

And if you think about it…Even after doing that, and we dont end up getting the rainbows and butterflies, at least we enjoyed the whole day thinking and focusing upon rainbows and butterflies and magic and success!

So many times we are focusing on the outcome, but we dont realize we are worrying the hell out of the process of manifesting them, and so we basically suffer and never actually enjoy the process. In fact we are so damn focused on the outcome being what we dont want to manifest, that we end up manifesting that very feared outcome!

Im going to try something new, and you can too if you dare 😉

To enjoy the process….

Ive never cared much about the process, i usually am inpatient to get the things finished and to move on to the next project, but I realize its no fun.

Lets try it out… to set our expectations thousand times more magical than it might seem to even possible come out to…

For example Im going to go to lunch with a friend ( i should actually be walking there right now! but i wanted to write this down and send it )….

I hope not only the food is great the conversation is awesome, we have an amazing time…but ambience is in the air, and magic sparks through, and suddenly a bucket load of opportunity to travel flys out of now where, and people we meet on the street are awesome, and suddenly i know how to clear all problems, and become inspired and end up creating something amazing and share it with the world, which then inspires them, and they share it with the world…. and on top of that…. something i cant even imagine comes about… a thousand times better… if fact lets just say its already all happened…and this is that moment… and not the road is full of new magical possibilities…

what if we all began to think of that … what if… what if….

Hmm… i dont know !

Lets find out 😉


Merry Christmas !! Happy Holidays 😉

Falling Open—- ‘Beauty in the Breakdown’ – FrouFrou

Blooming, bubbling, breathing big

open, gasp, touch, taste….reach swim, fear.
Blue, water flying bubbles,
Basting in bliss,
boundless bounty, protruding…
transition between the life and the death
old and new….
Blue and purple and green
face fearful and fractioned, yet free.
Falling Open.
InsideOut ~

Muneca Oscura

Sometimes its easer to put on a mask…no one has to know, you can hide it, we could pretend that everything is fine.

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Thats what people gravitate to right? ‘fine people’.’ why not just pretend we are so happy, so healthy, so confident and current?
If i take off my mask now, what could happen? I dont even like the vibes from that person  behind the mask.
She’s so introverted, so sensitive, so insecure. She seems so needy and afraid. timid.
How would she benefit me in anyway? Even if i wanted to take off the mask sometimes, it feels so uncomfortable, so unsafe.
 I rather put on my clown mask and paint my smile. I rather suck in all the fear and guilt. I rather stuff that part of myself in my purse and get on my way. Because that girl, she won’t ever be accepted, she won’t ever be valued.
She might have a lot of potential. She might actually turn out to be the most amazing person I’ve ever thought of becoming. She might make my life full of joy and love, full of acceptance and authenticity, full of peace and wholeness..full of freedom.
She might become famous, she might meet the man of her dreams. She might be the most purest healer and clearest light. She might be the moon for all i know. She might actually attract really good things, and really wonderful people in her life…
But….no, i can’t take that risk. I can’t start now, its too late. I have my friends, I have my status. I have my life.
Its better i just forget about it. Tuck her in, shut her up, chain her up, plug her ears, and and blind fold her eyes, because its just not worth the risk…..
or…. is it?
*************** side note….
We all have some darker less comfortable, acceptable, popular traits to ourselves. I know i have them…. Im always sensitive to share whats ‘under the shell’ but sometimes i feel it is a part of a healing process of becoming that much more complete, that much more whole, brave, and loving of yourself. Becoming more transparent, becoming more lighter, becoming freer of fear.
The more we bring our own light to our own dark, we realized we are the ones that make it dark ( we hide it/cover it up )….it really isn’t that dark…. and even if it is dark to us still… as we express it out from ourself through music, a conversation, a mediation, a journal or blog, exercise, friends, art, dancing…. we are moving the energy., the emotions.
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Little Blessings :)

Hey 🙂

I’m listening some music that i made from Garage band and i wanted to share somethings that make me happy 🙂

– Listening to the music i make :))) makes me feel so cool and awesome, i feel really good about myself and really proud of myself. It feels so good to experience your own creation made from fun and joy and authentic expression 🙂

-I like to receive texts from people i like, who enjoy and love being around with me. It feels good to be appreciated and thought of, and it feels good to know you have people in the world who like you and want to tell you that by asking to hang out, joining you for a cafe, or have a conversation with you, share some personal intimate stuff with you…i love love love love love that.

-I love writing on this blog…its a sense of connection and transparency…it opens up my self which i love to do, but is safe from where i dont feel so afraid to do it. I love writing and sharing insights, how i feel, what i think, about me, about things I’ve seen or experienced, and i love touching people in a good warm heart felt way, and i love learning to receive this from others.

– I love looking at the moon every morning when I’m walking to work. the world is quite and the sky is electric blue, the seagulls are sound calling with their earthy voices, i love seeing how bright the moon is and so brave she is to confidently show all of us how beautiful she is. I love seeing her grow in the sky and then wayne away into almost nothing. I love knowing even when i dont see her she’s still bright. She’s so beautifully powerful, and i want to be like her 🙂

-I love talking about things that feel and matter with people, i love connecting with awesome souls in whatever way i can. I love reading information and watching videos upon new insights, conscious evolution, astrology and divine messages from whatever being. I love using this thing to make more sense of my life and my own moment to moment experience

– I love talking to people i love and the people who love me

-I love seeing people perform and audition and be on stage in whatever way.I find them so beautiful and brave to put themselves upon a platform and be there. I love watching musicians and singers and dancers…artists in general!

– I love listening to music and feeling the energies of it. I love moving to the energies of it. I love hearing the words and the message of expression through the song. ILove the joy i feel and the emotions that run through my body.

-i love soaking in the warm sun rays on colder days and taking all that energy into my body visualizing all the energy hugging each one of my cells

-I love going out when i want to and being with friends and people, meeting new people and talking sharing experiences

-i love feeling excited and wonderful and interested about life. I love passion. I love synchronisty   where i was thinking something and then see it happen in my waking reality. I love being in Spain on such an adventure where i dont know where it will come out to. I love seeing and watching myself grown and experience. I love seeing this in others.

-i love praying and healing in ways that open my heart. I love health and plants and nature and wind and the world when i see the beauty and see the beauty of every individual i see. i love seeing their beauty, and i love seeing my own beauty. i love healing too.

-I love the computer and my phones letting me access people and information so easily, and i love my kids in my schools. they give me so much love and the enable me to poor so much love upon them… even though we are all absolutely crazy and have many issues…and even though sometimes the kids freak me out 😉 hahahah but i love them,and I’m so happy they are helping me overcome my fear of children and of conflict and of being powerful and strong and present.

So many more things i love, i didnt know i could love so many things, but it feels nice to write afew down, to realize it and acknowledge it.

So many new changes, I’m feeling it in many ways, and i think we are all doing a good job of allowing them come. What doesn’t need to be there won’t be. we are all creating space for the new beautiful stuff coming, perhaps already here 😉

I love you too ❤ for being here with me in my life in whatever way you are…not sure who you is but, think we all know.

much love



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